What I am thanking God for tonight

If you have a weak stomach, skip this post.  If not, be thankful that I don’t have any photos.

We went to Red Lobster this evening with Papa’s Birthday gift cards.  I planned to take a family photo and write a lovely post thanking my mom for his gift…”the best laid plans…”

Some background… Lucy has been sleeping lots this weekend.  She went to bed Friday night by 6:00.  She waffled on whether or not she wanted to go to a birthday party yesterday – way not like her – she (like her mother) is always up for a party.  She did go to the party.  Then she came home and slept for a while.  Then she woke up and played outside all afternoon with the neighbor kids. 

Off and on she has run a very low fever since Friday – never over 100.5.  And, I know, because yesterday I used her illness to justify a $35 thermometer!  I know it sounds crazy. (And, I was just congratulating myself on being a better steward of the family resources lately… I did go to Payless, another local shoe store, and Kohl’s this weekend – without buying anything! )  Back to the thermometer – IT ROCKS!  It is one of those cool ones that you just have to run across the forehead.  I LOVE it!  I have been taking her temp about every hour while she’s been sleeping tonight.  She is a little restless so I am worried.  I keep hearing her talk in her sleep (which she does sometimes) but she is yet to wake up.

So, today she went to church, did not take a nap and hasn’t run much of a fever that I have noticed.  (And, I would, given the new thermometer.)  Feeling too lazy to cook, Papa suggested Red Lobster.  I didn’t give it a second thought.  Off we went!  (Me thinking of that family photo.)

I had eaten my fill; Papa was bursting; the boys had cleaned most of their plates; Lucy hadn’t touched her chicken and had chased the baked potato around the plate.  I should back up here and note that she had complained of some stomach pain, worrying about eating a rotten strawberry before we left…  Now, to know my darling daughter is to know that she is a bit of a drama queen and a whiner.  I placated her worries with a nonchalant “Order Sprite.  It usually settles tummies.” 

Yeah, Sprite didn’t do it.

As the meal came to a close and I was thinking of digging out the camera she went to the bathroom (to use the bathroom).  She returned, started to say something, and the next thing I knew I was catching puke.  I dropped the strawberry-ish smelling slop in my plate only to cup hands for another catch.  I am proud to say that none made it to the carpet.  After another small bit, she said she was feeling better.  Luckily our perfect waitress had left extra napkins upon seating us.  I grabbed every napkin from the table and cleaned up the mess while quieting the four year old, shooting “stop laughing” looks at the eleven year old and using my most soothing voice to calm my oldest “child.”  Feeling the boys safe with Papa who looked as if he had fought off the urge to puke, I sent Lucy to the bathroom.  Amazingly I took a drink of tea, then followed her to scrub my hands!  She continued to assure me that all was well now.  She did go back to the table and eat a few bites of baked potato!  I passed the plate of (now well covered with the blessed napkins) puke to our AWESOME waitress, paid the bill (and tipped her fifteen bucks) and walked Lucy to the car with an extra plastic bag in hand. 

In the car all seemed well…Then, it gets interesting.  Papa rolled down his window just as we got on the entrance ramp to puke out the window.  I was laughing so hard at his weak stomach that I felt a little nauseous myself!  With puke on every window down the side of my Suburban, I was begging him to go to the car wash. 

I called my boss to let her know that I would need a substitute tomorrow.   I called my friend to tell the story and laugh at Papa some more.

We stopped at the car wash only to realize that we didn’t have enough quarters to start it up!  Papa puked like three more times at the car wash.  At this point I felt a little guilty for making fun of him and a little worried that he was in fact getting truly sick himself. 

We did make it home.  I sent Lucy straight to bed.  So far, no more puke – from anyone.  Hopefully tomorrow will be an uneventful day!  I’m off to get some rest myself.  I’ll be thanking God for my strong stomach before I go to sleep this evening!

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6 Comments

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6 responses to “What I am thanking God for tonight

  1. Oh my gosh, Amy I am sorry! But, I have to laugh a bit at Papa Bear too…
    I remember when my mom had knee surgery while I was home on break from college. She needed help changing her dressing and I did it. (My sister, the tough one, couldn’t bear to look at it.) She said, “You’re ready to be a mom.” It’s true…when you love someone, you’re suddenly able to put up with a lot more gross stuff. I, too, have caught puke. (The only time I had to fight my own gag reflex was while cleaning up sheets covered in what used to be Lambert’s pass-arounds. But, I was pregnant with Eli at the time.) In all the first pictures of me with Lily, I have vernix on my lip because the very first thing I did was kiss that messy little baby! Still, it’s never fun to deal with puke. So, the mother in me salutes the mother in you…and hopes today truly is uneventful!

  2. Bob

    That may be the best story ever.

  3. jen

    Now that is awesome – none on the carpet!
    Poor Papa though!

  4. I have cleaned up a lot of my kid’s puke, but never at the table of a restaurant. I think it was very thoughtful of you to leave such a nice tip for the waitress!

    • Awesome post, Ames!! You wrote it so well I felt like I was there. I can almost smell the vomit. Amazing the things we’ll do when necessary, isn’t it? I’m still laughing at Papa. My husband also couldn’t deal with our only urgent care visit (so far) when a can of tomatoes fell out of the pantry and knocked out Skylar’s tooth at the age of 20 months leaving an open lip which required 5 stitches. The doctor politely asked me to get rid of him because his pacing and panting was making the baby anxious. So, I sent him off to the grocery store to buy Otter Pops for the baby. Good thing Momma’s get the crisis gene.

  5. Pingback: Insteristing « have fun. be good.

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